YOLO Is Fucking Ludicrous

I jumped on the bandwagon of telling people my own age to get off my lawn a long time ago. Here, we continue driving.

You Only Live Once…unless you’re Hindu. But then, you’re probably not too concerned with coming up with excuses for partying; you’re too busy writing poems for cows. And even if you’re not Hindu, you might believe in some form of everlasting life. But I digress.
YOLO is the current bane of my young existence. These fucking kids, man. You actually don’t need a motive to have fun beside the fact that it’s fun per se. What are you trying to prove, and to who? It’s not a valid reason for anything except You Only Die Once.

So young things nowadays use YOLO to pardon their insipid behaviors…like a friend who decided to bubble in the offending initialism on his scantron sheet in lieu of actually answering the questions on his test (another penciled in “Skrillex,” which is even worse, but that’s another post altogether). Some Teen Mom alum apparently has the letters on her chest, right above her breast implants (and farther above her previously occupied uterus). And so on.
If you ask me? YOLO is actually an argument for not being a goddamn dumbass. You only live once, so you better not fuck it up by doing a bunch of hard drugs that may be fun now, but, since you’re not a trust fund baby, will likely only prevent you from being a functional adult in the future.
You allegedly only live once. Immature children think this means to live it up without thought of consequences, but I say it’s a call for moderation: Don’t be too mild, or life won’t be worth the effort; don’t be too wild, or life will end in shambles.
Unless you’re Ozzy Osbourne.

About Helena

I'm too Internet-old for this.
This entry was posted in Humor, Writing and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to YOLO Is Fucking Ludicrous

  1. Foxfur says:

    My keyboard is soaked with wine that shot out of my nose @ “poems to cows” and “breast implants / previously occupied uterus”.
    I love your way with words!

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